Transformed...renewed...washed clean

"i just wanna have fun"!

2009-05-29T13:11:00.000-07:00

Its coming up for summer and would say I’m a summer girl.

I love summer, I love the sun, I love the heat, I love going to the beach and lake with all my friends. Summer just seems such a great season of fellowship, barbeque's. Its all awesome!!

But I caught myself thinking, thinking about the definition of ‘fun’.

What is fun?

So as We are approaching the summer season our ultimate agenda of summer is FUN,

We gotta look at this from God’s perspective, biblical perspective.
Summer just seems like we end up doing anti-biblical and we pursue pleasure instead!
Anytime you pursue pleasure you are going to face trouble.

Sin is fun, if it was’t fun we wouldn't have any problems. Don’t ever let anyone say to you that sin is not fun. Don’t DE-funk sin.
We are living in a culture, in a world that has bought into a huge lie this false market of what FUN is.
Sin is fun, but sin is fun for ONLY a SEASON
For the moment….. Living for the moment.
think about it
If it’s not fun in the morning it is not fun! If I can’t laugh about it in church it is not fun! Seriously lets get real, lets get honest with ourselves about it.

Seriously what is fun? What defines fun? What does the bible say about fun? What does our culture say? What is fun?? I have a lot of questions as you can see. But we have all found ourselves asking ourselves these questions.

We gotta define the whining teenagers response and even adults
“I just wanna have fun”
Is it a momentary feeling that we have? Is it a substance that we put in our bodies That gives us this feeling.

IS THIS FUN? -

I have kids saying that its fun! pre-martial sex is fun, marijuana is fun, dirty dancing is fun you know what sin is fun, I'm not going to lie this is all fun but this kind of fun will only last for a season then you will find yourself unsatisfied, empty and confused!

Is it fun when you feel shame and guilt after?

Culture says it is fun. Culture says do it more, and you wont think about it and it will be alright and it’s a vicious cycle over and over and over and over again and it restricts you and puts you in bondage of your own pursuit of pleasure and you are NEVER satisfied!!

I hate hate hate how the enemy has tricked this world with this lie of what fun is, this reality of fun that puts your straight into bondage, that momentary of fun with the person you just slept with when drunk your now pregnant and thinking what did i get myself into? and now your restricted because your going to have a child for the rest of your life or now you have STD.
Hold up for a moment! Don’t get mad of what you just read here, understand that God can transform and restore, what I’m trying to bring us down to is what do we know is fun?

okay Bekah we get the point now, so what is fun? all my friends at school are doing it, they seem to have fun.

John 10:10 New living translation,
i
The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and
destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

THIS was a huge wake up call for me. – that Jesus, his PURPOSE is to give YOU and I a satisfying life, a full life, a life to ALL its fullness, abundantly to the MAXIMUM!
HELLO??? its says JESUS his purpose, God’s purpose coming down here to earth was to give ME life to the fullest!!

God refuses to call fun what cannot satisfy.
God says fun is fulfillment and he wants to satisfy the desires of your heart!

God says my kinda fun is fulfillment.

What does the bible define as fun? Psalms 16 :11 presence comes before pleasure. If you get God’s presence you get everything! Pleasures forevermore.

Are you having fun yet??
If your not, go back to the book and find out what fun is!!

my very first sermon

2009-05-02T20:23:00.001-07:00

Be careful what you pray for and what you ask God to do in your life, if you pray that God will open new doors for you, be prepared because he’s going to do exactly that! Its up to you to step out of the boat.
God really loves to surprise me, stretch me, and challenge me, and open doors for me.

I got asked a couple of months ago to speak at Comox valley Christian school…. Jokingly I said yes.
So I’ve been praying these past few weeks on what God would like me to speak on, I wasn’t given a theme or a subject but was told I could speak on anything. And the plan was to speak to the high school girls.
I had something prepared and it was going to be a talk on intimidation and inadequacy. …..And girl stuff.
We have some awesome beautiful girls that attend this school and I know that God has an amazing call on each one of them so I knew that this talk would be appropriate to them, because unfortunately the enemy loves to attack us on intimidation and inadequate thoughts about ourselves.
BUT - ‘We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us’!

I spoke at the school on May 1st…….. few days before I went to finish up on preparing my talk at Zocalo’s on 5th street Courtenay…. I love this little place!
As I was finishing off my points and outline the Holy Spirit decided to surprise me by saying ‘ your not going to be talking on this’.
I thought ‘Great!’ in a bit of a sarcastic tone, truthfully I wasn’t impressed
“I just spent lots of time on this! But Okay you know better! You better give me something quick!”

I’m having a little giggle to myself right now, God is good.

2 Days before I spoke I went to the church and was informed that the speaker for the guys had cancelled… and that I was now to speak to all off them.
My heart sank and I started to feel inadequate.
BUT! – It all made sense to why I wasn’t to speak on what I had prepared days before.

The DAY BEFORE I was to speak the Holy Spirit started to speak and so off I went with a pen and paper wrote for a few hours.
I was actually pretty impressed by what the Holy Spirit was giving me.

It was about our attitudes towards worship, could we really praise and worship God under any circumstance in any situation?
I love love love the story of Paul and Silus because every time I read it, I’m convicted! I’m really challenged and I love their attitude!
It was all about their attitude and choosing to worship God sooo this is what I started to prepare to talk on.

I was also very thankful to get a phone call from 2 of my closest friends Breanne and Lexi to let me know that they were coming along with me to the school to intercede while I preached. I have amazing friends…

I really couldn’t sleep the night before, not because I was nervous but because I was soooo STOKED! The Holy Spirit was just bubbling inside of me a fire in my belly!
I eventually Feel asleep around 1am and woke up at 6am not because I chose to but because the Holy Spirit told me to! And I’m glad he did because it was an awesome morning to spend with Jesus.

Off to the school I went…. A little nervous but Stoked!
We had worship in chapel and I realized why the Holy Spirit gave me the message I prepared…
What would we do without him directing our ways???

I was really surprised at how it all went, I love it when you can walk off stage from leading worship or preaching and saying ‘ I didn’t do any of that’!
That’s EXACTLY how I felt; I didn’t have to do anything but allow the Holy Spirit to speak through me.

I also had my first sermon blooper as well, I asked the kids to picture Paul and Silus situation in the prison what they could have felt like and told them to picture them NAKED!!! – Then I quickly corrected myself!
But it was a good laugh, we all laughed!
After the chapel I took all the girls for a bible class and took them outside in the sunshine! It was awesome! We all had lots of fun, and I loved loved sharing and having fellowship with each one of them.

I’ve been completely challenged these past few weeks that I know that God has a plan for me, and the things that have been prophesied over me I just didn’t realize it would all happen so soon, but God has been stretching me, molding me constantly I’m learning to step out of my comfort zone and stepping out of the boat.
And I am BLESSED!!!

the Joy of the lord IS my strength

2009-04-01T15:51:00.000-07:00

The joy of the lord IS my strength..

ponder that for a moment, be still.... think about it?

Im having a joyful moment, lately I've been waking up every morning completely stoked! My cup overflows!
Its quite funny how God works! I love his surprises...

I just attended a youth and young adults conference called the 'Filling Station' in Surrey BC, accompanied by two awesome men of God, who strive only to go deeper, hungry and thirsty for more of him.
The weekend I have to say was pretty awesome, I get so pumped seeing young adults, junior highs and high school student hungry! their boldness, with arms high, stepping forward in having a personal relationship with their saviour... (sighs, takes a deep breath, ahhhhhh and smiles)
Inn a way God started something new in me, he does continue to stretch me constantly, he really taught me how to be still...to rest in him, to trust in him, to step out in confidence in him.
Yes I've heard this so many times but this time the Holy Spirit was training me, i was actually learning it, actually experiencing it. Knowing that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, I said ALL things! I can move a mountain with him being the strength of my life.

I'm the type of person that when there's worship going on and most people are at the front jumping I immediately dive right in... Ready to get my praise on!
But this time at the conference every time I headed to the front to jump and dance, the Holy spirit immediately would tell me, 'i want you to go to the back' a little disappointed i pouted my lips and headed to the back
i don't really know why God was asking me to do this, i know we can get to pumped being up at the front, adrenaline is rushing, were dancing before our king but i think God was wanting me to do this so i wouldn't be distracted by the people around me, it would just be me and Jesus.

In Chapel before the service we spent a lot of time on our knees, praying for breakthrough in spiritual warfare, praying for our leaders and speakers, for the kids, for our young adults.
Man oh man its so powerful to see how God turns up and the Holy Spirit pouring, pouring, stirring, stirring.
We all had an expectation that God would move and he did! Lives were touched, the altars were full of kids on their knees giving their lives to Jesus.
So powerful to see, we get excited we jump with Joy over their lives, we jump with Joy when we see God moving in their lives. Wohoooo!!

Filling station's theme this year was about 'Grace', we had awesome speakers, Simon Gau, Donna and Doug Lasit from Portland, Oregon.

Simon spoke on the Friday night about how we are covered by God's Grace, and questioning us 'do our hearts burn to follow? Because if they don't we are in trouble!'

We all had workshops that followed on the Saturday, I attended Donna Lasit's workshop on worship. Oh wow I was so blessed, so encouraged, so impacted, so in AWE.
Did you know that worship is like to kiss the hand of God. ......picture that for a moment, it puts a big smile on your face doesn't it?
Donna sang, I love how God places songs on her heart randomly, then she spoke a little maybe about ten minutes, but those 10 minutes were very very encouraging, I think I may have cried throughout the whole workshop. Just a joyful, Godly cry.... people who know me well know that I cry lots when I'm in the presence of God, joyfully and sometimes when my heart breaks for others. Anyway!
Later on that day I attended the 2nd workshop of Doug's class on Timothy 2, we talked about the life of timothy how Paul was a little crazy ha ha so we learned the spirit of leadership I was loving it!
A lot of laughs, a lots of AMENS!
Later on that evening Pastor Doug Lasit spoke again on 'what is the cause you are living for?, what is that cause? what it means to live for Jesus,
our CAUSE is this – we live to love God, build the church, reach humanity with the Love of Jesus.

Sunday church at Bible Fellowship is always awesome, I love the pastors, the people, all of us gathered together. I love it :)
Doug and Donna both spoke that morning, Doug was at 9am and Donna was at 11am, unfortunately i was running a little late and only heard Donna spoke.
Donna spoke on Idolatry, on how idolatry is anything you put above God! Anything you put 1st above God is Idolatry, we need to know what is important to us.
2 kings 17- they worshipped worthless idols you become worthless yourself, you are doing to find yourself worthless when you put things in front of God.

Donna also talked about Idol image- our desire to be accepted, that the world has bought into the lie that even I have bought into this lie that if you look good you will feel good. Yes you can feel good for a time... but it wont last long. Its an insecurity issue and I think so many of us deal with it.
Donna really challenged us on understanding what worship is, I think its something that we really need to study and meditate on, really look at it from God's perspective not our own.

Think about this - Can we really worship God at our lowest point, our darkest moment when everything has been taken away from us?
I love love love, in-fact my favourite story in the bible is the story of Paul and Silus in Acts 16- Paul and Silus are stuck in prison they were praying and singing , the other prisoners must of thought these guys were a bunch of loony's because they were NAKED, they are in the worst conditions, there probably in pain, their chained up and there's probably rats running around their feet, YET they praised and worshipped God.
I love that it stirs something within me and I get so excited, its time that we got our praise on in every situation, his praise shall always be on our lips!

I'm actually getting side-tracked.. because I was planning on talking about my trip and stay in Portland not the Filling station, I just got to excited :)

Sooooo how it came about... on the Sunday after Donna spoke at church, my two closest friends Deanna and Daniel were heading back to Portland Bible College, but before all that happened I bumped into Doug Lasit and mentioned that I had two friends from the bible college and i mentioned to him that I thought it would be an awesome idea if I came down for the week and he agreed .... but truthfully I didn't think I would actually go.
So just before Daniel and Deanna left for Portland I had very little time to make my decision! It was a little ' should i stay or should i go now' moment. Soooooooo a lot of people encouraged me to go... and I did hesitate so many times just because i didn't have enough clothes and my hair straightener and felt i was very unprepared.
So the conversation an hour before we left surrey was, yes, no,yes, no, maybe, yes, no, no, no ,yes, i don't know. Ha ha so you can imagine! I had no idea if I were to go or not.
I am very very happy that I went! I Soaked in so much, I got to experience awesome teaching from the classes at the bible college, amazing worship at chapel, Lisa Trent spoke at youth on Wednesday! Oh how amazing it was, the altar was flooded with kids!!!
I am super blessed! I am rich in the blessings of God.
Not to mention that I was surrounded by amazing, amazing, amazing people of God. The girls in the dorm were so loveable.
I'm having a little giggle with myself :).
when an opportunity arises last minutes like that, Go for it! Unless there is big Red lights going off and the Holy Spirit is very clear with his 'NO'.

I'm excited to go home and back to my church! I miss all my youth, excited to spend time with my Sunday school kids! Just excited to be with my church family in general.
I wasn't gone that long but whenever I'm away from home and my church. I miss them and get so excited to see them when I come back.

As you can tell I'm pretty high on life right now...!!

JESUS!!!

Struck

2009-02-17T21:37:00.000-08:00

I’ve been struck, like a bullet to the heart, a bit of a wake up call.
I have been shaken, like a medicine bottle, ‘shake well before use’ I really needed to be shaken well before God could of used me.

As a youth leader in my church I’m held to a higher standard, people ARE watching me, watching my reactions, my attitude for I am an example.
If you think about it every Christian is, every Christian should be held to a higher standard for everyone is watching us, the world is. They are watching Christians. How they act, the words they say and use (are they words of life or words of death?)

I have to say, it took me a while to get this. And I admit I have failed miserably in this area of example I could have done better, a lot better. Yes we are human we do make mistakes but we need to think about the people around us, who are we affecting?
I’m not saying I’m trying to be perfect, not at all because I know I never will be and we do learn from mistakes, sometimes we could of dealt with a situation better but from experience we will know how to approach it if it happens again in the future.
Do we want to leave people a bad taste of Christians? heck no!

I have to admit through my years when I was 16/17 I hated Christians. I didn’t have a good taste of Christians. When I thought of Christians the things that came to mind were not positive at all I thought they are all backstabbers, ‘holier’, prideful twats. Obviously I had a lot of bitterness and unforgivness in my heart. Thank you Jesus for changing my heart! I’ve fallen madly in love with the church and the church family!

I’ve come to realize that I have received gift after gift, grace after grace! And when Im old I will take a step back and have a glance on my past and know I will be overwhelmed by how much God has done in my life. It comes down to GRACE, a word we don’t hear enough.

To be continued…..

I am just a girl....

2009-01-30T09:42:00.000-08:00

I am just a girl standing in front of a man they call saviour.

In rags and ashamed I’m afraid to look at him in the eyes

I want to kiss his feet but I feel unworthy.

He wants to sit and talk to me, to love on me?

I lay my head in my hands and cover my face, how can this man love me?

Tears fall off my face and he wipes them away, he lifts my chin up and calls me Princess, Daughter of the king.

I have rags, stains and covered in dirt he wants to wash me clean and renew my heart

I have just met this man they call Saviour, but he has been In my heart for a very long time.

He loves me and makes me whole.

I don’t understand this grace because the world cannot give it; it’s a beautiful gift that I do not deserve.

He holds out his hand and we walk, we walk this road called life,

He is constantly smiling at me.

I have fallen in love with this man they call saviour.

He is beautiful and I adore him, his presence, his love, and his indescribable grace

I am his and he is mine, my king, my savior, my husband, my everything,

He is Jesus Christ the Messiah, the one I have been looking for.

2009-01-15T10:36:00.000-08:00

So I'm laying on a hospital bed at this very moment as i write this,

I'm very impressed that I have my very own TV with Internet and I can make and receive phone calls with my very own personal number, high five, very nice

I'm not worried, although my mother is freaking out, I don't blame her, if I found my daughter collapsed on the floor I would be to.
It was weird, I woke up feeling perky went downstairs felt a big pop in my stomach then i was on the floor....then from that moment on I had severe pains so bad that I couldn't stand or move. So off to the hospital we go, I waited in the emergency ward for ages to be seen, then a good old family friend ended up examining me which was pretty awesome...and weird. Then I had a young student who looked like he just left high school wanting to stick a flipping cannula in my arm for a drip, usually I would say yes go for it but i freaked out a little and asked if a real doctor could do it, he ended up doing worse and failed twice to put it in me not to mention it really hurt and i may have said a very bad word....feeling very guilty.

I'm laying here eating my dinner, its quite good and i get ice-cream wahay

but i watch this woman across from me who has just been told she has cancer, unfortunately the don't tell her privately but simply pull the curtain over to tell her.
her family arrive and know nothing yet until she starts crying. it was awful, the curtain is closed but all you can hear is family tears. the doctor came back and explained everything to the woman, repeatedly apologising about the news.
i cant imagine what this woman and her family are going through, but i pray that GOD will do a miracle.
for doctors to tell news like this, i just couldn't do it. i would cry with my patients, i would pray with them.

let us pray for those who are sick and believe that GOD will bring healing in Jesus name.

A little Testimony

2009-01-13T08:36:00.000-08:00

This wasn’t easy for me to write, Testimonies are great but this one wasn’t easy for me to write, I took a glance back and said okay here it goes, I’m going to write.
This is a Testimony of a season in my life that I haven’t really talked about with many people, simply because it was a time I didn’t want to remember.
It took me a while to write this, I teared up a couple of times writing this, trying to remember what I was going through in those moments. I teared up because it also reminded me of God’s grace and no matter what situation you’re going through, he is there.

It’s quite long but please do take the time to read it, :)

For ever how long I can remember since I was child through out primary school, high school and college I allowed people to walk over me, bully me and torment me through those years.
I didn’t know how to stand up or speak up for myself, I didn’t know how to, it wasn't my nature, I just allowed people to walk over me, use me and treat me like I was dirt off the ground.
I don’t remember I lot from my school years, etc friendships or even learning, all I remember is coming home crying everyday, shutting myself away from the world I would constantly curl up in a corner and cry in my pillow.

Primary school were horrible years of sillyness, I remember having stones thrown at me, My Mother arguing with other mothers to tell there kids to leave me alone.

High school was a lot worse horrible years of torment, I’ve been to 4 high schools; I wasn’t a trouble child I was very shy. (Shocker! Yes I Rebekah was shy in her high school years.)
I started attending Loudoun Academy in Ayrshire after I got back from Canada when I was 15 and a bit.
I didn’t know anyone and I didn’t stay at that school long enough to know anyone, i was there for no longer than 5 months.
These were the hardest, challenging 5 months of my life.

If you have seen the movie ‘mean girls’, at the beginning of the movie Lindsay Lohan’s character starts off at this new school, nobody talks to her and she spend her first few lunches sitting on a toilet seat eating her lunch. That was me, no joke. I actually did that, but scrap out the eating lunch bit on the toilet seat that’s a little disgusting.
All I remember is that people weren’t warm to me, teased and tormented me.
I had my head smacked off a computer by one of the girls in class as the teacher had quickly popped out to get something. I was stunned and confused in why this girl had all of a sudden done that to me, I hadn’t done anything to her!
I walked out that classroom afraid, numb, and confused I just wanted to run (ever had that feeling where you just wanted to run and didn't care where) I had that feeling a lot.
I still couldn’t stick up for myself I didn’t want to because that would only cause a fight.
A friend told my mum what had happened and the next thing I knew my mum had called up the school to let them know what happened. My mum would always be so mad when things like this happened, it was too constant. Like any mother they would hate to see their child being bullied for no reason, you would want to protect them and stick up for them.

For some stupid reason telling the school what happend to your child can be the worst thing ever, it causes more problems.
Ayrshire is not the place to do that, you’re only asking for trouble not just for yourself but for your family.

Things got a lot worse, those 5 months were so difficult my relationship with God was the only thing keeping me alive. Every morning before school and after school I would be on my knees praying and face down in worship. I needed God more than ever.
One morning I remember being on my knees praying and I felt the Holy spirit saying to me “prepare yourself today something is about to happen” it wasn’t a warning but I remember thinking ‘oh finally this is the day that something good is going to happen! maybe people will want to be my friend, maybe God is going to do something really awesome today’.
Well God certainly did, but it wasn’t what I had in mind.

The music department is separated from the main building and I remember coming out of the music department to go to my other class, all of sudden I hear yelling behind me, next thing my hair was being pulled back, I was on the ground and my head was being hit off a brick wall.
I was being kicked, punched and spat on by this girl, I saw all the kids and even some of my ‘friends’ surrounding us, doing nothing.

No cheering, just watching.

A kept hearing this verse over and over again ‘The Lord is my light and salvation whom shall I fear, the Lord is the strength of all I am, whom shall I be afraid. All I could feel was God’s presence, he was right there beside me.

I felt no pain as this girl kept kicking me over and over again.
I managed to pull myself up and walk to the first aid room but I didn’t quite make it there, I collapsed on the way and I remember being carried to the first aid room by the janitor. I sat on the bed crying and crying, the nurses held me “its going to be okay” they kept saying. I knew it would be but I wasn’t crying because that girl beat me to the ground, I was crying because I was so overwhelmed that the thing I needed the most was God to be right there beside me, and he was!
Later I was taken to Hospital, I had no broken bones or any serious injuries, just a concussion.

The next day I had a Police Officer come over to my house and sat me down asking if I wanted to press charges on this girl. I thought about it but I knew this would go on her record, that this could affect her life, and so I didn’t. The Officer was quite shocked and astonished that I refused; he kept repeating “are you sure?”
I was very sure, I didn’t hate the girl I wasn’t even mad at her, I wanted to be mad at her but I couldn’t.
To this day I still don’t really know why I couldn’t be mad at her but I think it was God working on my heart with instant forgiveness and teaching me about what Grace.

I didn't go back to school after that, my family didn't want me to. But I did go back for 1 day and that day was to let my Principal know I wasn’t coming back and also to confront the girl who attacked me. I wanted to let her know that I forgave her. It wasn’t hard to tell her, she pretty much laughed in my face and called me every horrible name you could imagine. I walked away with a smile, I ignored the lies and I kept my head up high knowing my position as a daughter of Christ and no one could separate me from the Love of God and his amazing, indescribable Grace.

God walked me through some tough times during that season in my life, I really struggled with depression during that time and thought it would be so much easier to make everything go away by ending my life, I tried to so many times by suffocating myself in a pillow, I failed to take my life so many times. I was in and out if hospital because my mum would randomly find me on the floor unconscious meanwhile I have worship music playing in the background? I try to remember those days, what I was going through, what I was feeling, what I was going through in my head. All I know is that Satan tormented me he wanted me dead, he’s out to do 3 things, steal, kill and destroy. I remember crying on the floor so much begging God to let me come home and be with him. He kept reminding me of Jeremiah 29:11. I just couldn’t see it at the time because Satan had me wrapped up in chains. Those chains needed to be broken.
Yes those days were very difficult but I will never forget the moment my father, my saviour protecting me filling me with his words of life, reminding me,

‘The Lord is my light and Salvation whom shall I fear, the Lord is the strength of all I am whom shall I be afraid.’

I wasn’t going to blog this but I felt it was on my heart to do so.
There can be times in our lives where we want to give up but know that that is the very thing that the enemy wants you to do, we aren’t going to let him have his glory.
We will stand up against him for he is under us and God has given us the authority to speak against him.

We will sing,

‘The enemy is being defeated and death couldn’t hold you down, were going to life our voice in victory were going to make your praises loud,
Shout onto God with a voice of triumph, shout onto God with a voice of praise, shout onto God with a voice of Triumph we life your name up! We life your name up!

swim at your own risk, Just say Nay

2009-01-05T05:34:00.000-08:00

I read this amazing Testimony on myspace.com/abstinenceisawesome

A few weeks ago my wonderful dear close friend Lexi Wilton showed me this testimony on the website above, I'm not sure who wrote the story but i thank the girl for what she shared, it was very encouraging and spoke LIFE,

I wanted to write about this on where i've been, but this girl did it all for me it was like reading my own testimony.
I have to share it,

here is is,

"I have the right to do anything," you say - but not everything is beneficial. "I have the right to do anything" - but I will not be mastered by anything [...] Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins people commit are outside their bodies, but those who sin sexually sin against their own bodies. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies. 1 Corinthians 6:12 and 18-20.

I'm not going to start bashing anyone here. Nor is the Bible. I've been struggling with this stuff for years, and I know I'm not the only one.]

I was sitting at Michikewis in my car today, reading my chapters for Economics (which is a jolly good time... HA) and I saw a sign that said, "Swim at your ownrisk."

I started thinking analagously (SURPRISE). Physical contact with other people is a "Swim at your own risk" action.
It's not a sin to kiss someone. But you're swimming at your own risk. The undertow is strong, and we are small.
The Hebrew word for kiss literally means "tokindle." When you kiss someone, you're lighting (and feeding) a fire.It's not that hard to get to the point of, "It was only a kiss - How did it end up like this?" (A la The Killers).

Sex was intended to be part of a permanent relationship within the context of marriage: an expression of passion and love between two people whose desire for each other will always be exclusive and intimate.
Saving sex for marriage is not a curse; it's a gift. If you get sexually involved before you're married, you're cheating yourself and your husband or wife out of something really special and amazing. You bear the cost of your actions.

The stuff from 1 Corinthians 6 has nothing to do with God being out to get us for not being sexually pure. We have to take the consequences. We have babies, we get STDs, we're emotionally scarred.
God bought us at a price - We are SPECIAL and BEAUTIFUL and PURE toHim.

He is crazy about us.

We're not subjects He's anxious to bark orders at. As Christians, we're His kids, and He loves us more than we could ever even begin to ask Him to. He gave us the gift of our sexuality for the purpose of enjoying a special relationship with one person - it's JUST LIKE the way He wants our relationship with Him to be.
He desires an intimate, passionate, undying relationship with us.If you've ever read Song of Solomon, you know that a lot of stuff in there is pretty racy... And it's in the BIBLE? Whoaaa. That book is all about showing us God's desire for intimacy with us.
We (the church) are His bride.

The key is not to get as close to having sex as you can without having sex.

The intention is to GIVE as much of yourself as you can to the man or woman you spend the rest of your life with.
Do you really want to fool around now at the cost of your marital sexual relationship? Even if you don't go all theway, it's still going to damage you in the end.

You were given your sexuality for a purpose - a better goal than getting in the backseat of the car with someone who you're not really sure you're going to be with for the rest of your life. I don't have EVERYTHING to give to myhusband... I wish I did, but I don't. I hate knowing that I'm going to have to give him what's left over of me. He won't be the first person that I've been intimate with. I hate knowing that.

If you haven't made sexual mistakes yet, please don't sell yourself short by giving yourself up now. It's not worth it. If you have made mistakes, you probably know exactly what I'm talking about. Maybe you've done a little, maybe you've done a lot. It's not to late to start over. It never has been, and it never will. God's love is everlasting, and He's never unwilling to forgive. He can bring you to the place where you're able to forgive yourself and start over.

Seriously, the best weapon you can have in the fight for purity is accountability.

I am so blessed to have beautiful, godly, passionate women in my life (You lovely ladies know who you are) who don't give up on me and always ask how I'm doing in my purity. We've all made mistakes, but we are all standing for something more important than our mistakes - our future. Accountability is nowhere near easy, but it's so necessary, and it's a huge help.
I love, respect, and admire my ladies to infinity and beyond.
Something beautiful that brought me to tears is from the book of Jeremiah. In a lot of otherplaces in the Bible, Israel is compared to a prostitute.

In Jeremiah31, God is rejoicing over her return to Him. Look at what He says abouther.
I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness. I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt, O Virgin Israel. Again you will take up your tambourines and go out todance with the joyful. Jeremiah 31:3-4.

God restores whores.

I cried when I read that, because I've always had an issue with believing God could forgive me for the mistakes I make in life, let alone believing I could forgive myself.
Being reminded about His heart for me gave me a new perspectiveon purity... I am His first and foremost. He wants me to come to Him WITH ALL OF MY RUBBISH.
He never said, "Get rid of all the bad stuff you've done, become perfect, and THEN come to me for forgiveness and love." We are wretches indeed, but His heart is bigger than our blunders.
He is the one that cleans us off. We can't do it alone. When we come to Him, He's willing and able to make us new again.

I CAN STILLWEAR WHITE ON MY WEDDING DAY, because God has made me pure again. He washed away the disgusting stains I wore and gave me new, white,beautiful robes to wear, because that's who He is. That's the wholenature of salvation - He takes your fithy rags and gives you new life.
The thing is, He stays in one place. We are the ones who move far away from Him. The further we get from Him, the easier it is to cover our white robes in stains. But if we stay close to Him and make Him our focus, we're not going to be wading through garbage, holding our robes up so we can get a minimal amount of muck on our purity. We'll be close enough that we don't have to run very far to reach Him. The closer weget, the less likely it is that we'll have a reason to come running back covered in rubbish.

Save it for Marraige

- Know that God is a God who transforms, renews and washes clean everything that is not of him. I love how God restores. Don't ever be ashamed of your Testimony, your Testimony is so important, no matter if its little or Big, God will use you to speak words to a lifeless world!
it could change someone's life, someone's view on life.

My little Brother, Brodie

2009-01-04T15:12:00.000-08:00

I love his Testimony! unfortunatly its taking a very very long time to upload the video of his testimony but heres a bit about him.

He is 11 years old and he truly amazes me, an incredibly talented handsome guy.

The thing that blows me away about my brother is that he is confident, he is Confident in God, he is bold, he faces his fears

I love how God is molding him and I love how he is willing to do whatever God tells him to do his obedience and submission. I always remember him from a very Young age that he has been never ashamed of Jesus, never ashamed to tell people, even to strangers on the street. He really is an amazing a person of Integrity.

I love the gifts and talents God has placed in his life he has such an amazing gift of evangelism, anyone that has met him knows what I mean. He's never shy and loves to talk, he always talks about his passions in life, he constantly stirs up his passion.

I'm so excited to see what God is going to do in his life, I have complete confidence in him because I know that God has began a good, GREAT work in him and its still to be completed! Phil 1:6I

it isn't over for him God has so much more! I know that he will be a man after God's heart, and he already is.

I love how you can hear him a mile away! seriously you can, I love the story that Pastor Craig tells about my brother when we house sat for the Powell's next door to them, The Millar's thought that my brother was playing with a whole bunch of kids when in fact it was only himself, and I know that the girls were pretty freaked out by him :)

I love how he is loud, I see visions of him at the front of a battle running towards the enemy,fearless and yelling 'devil you won't defeat me'. He has yelled this while playing with his swords.

He pours out unconditional love towards anyone and will make friends with almost anyone in any place. he will make you laugh, even though he tells the worst jokes ever and can be kinda weird sometimes, he still makes anyone especially me laugh.

Best of all, He makes me breakfast! i'm blessed!

I love my Brother so much and I'm so proud to be his Sister

Gossip

2009-01-03T06:02:00.000-08:00

I’ve come to realize that my attitude lately, stinks.

God is breaking intimidation and offences in my life continually everyday.I cannot allow the enemy to keep pulling me down and keep targeting me with these weaknesses.

My weaknesses, I care to much about what is going on in people lives, I want to know what’s going on in peoples lives.
I keep looking for the solution when people come to me and talk.
I need to stop solving things and just listen.

Gossip is so huge, When I think of gossip I think that in a lot of conversations go on, its mostly gossip and talking about other people’s lives not very nicely.
When I was in high school and college then main high light of conversation was talking about other people, we would point out people and make fun of them by what they wear etc.
There was no life in our conversations, all we ever did was backstab and talk about other people. .....How sad

During my 3rd year at college, things got a whole lot better it was as though we all understood how gossip destroyed people, this reason was because the 2nd year of beauty therapy so many people never came back to college because they were so hurt and affected by gossip.
During the 3rd year I can proudly say, not once did gossip reach my ear or was spoken, And when it did happen it was sorted immediately with the two people who had issues in a correcty manor.
We all got along very well and when we didn’t we took the guts by stepping forward and confronting each other. When I look back to my 3rd year of college, I have to say I look back in delight of it all, the care for each other, the encouragement we received from each other; we never gave up on each other.
We were all like family and a very good team!And that’s the way it should have been. If one of us were out of money we would help the person.
I had one close friend who was going through a rough time at her home, her brother got out of jail and came back to the home only to destroy it all. He did a lot of damage. As this was happening, my friend phoned me crying on the phone, I could hear all the banging and breaking of glass, I could hear screaming of people in the background. Immediately I called a friend to come pick me up and to take me to her.We picked her up and allowed the police to deal with the rest and She stayed with me for a few days.
As you can see, we were all very close.If something happened we would call each other no matter what time it was if we were in need or danger. I look back on my 3rd year of college and think, I loved them all, Each one of them genuinely.
Now my 2nd year of college on the other hand was a disaster for me, gossip was so out of control, people were so selfish and didn’t care about each other. I had no friends and the people that were ‘friends’ only were because they couldn’t make any friends because of their bad history of backstabbing.I was a friend with all the backstabbers and gossipers, why? Because no one else would be their friend and I wasn’t going to allow them to sit on their own all the time and have a horrible year. Yea they have struggles but it didn’t make me love them any less, I stood by them.... But so many times they hurt me also because they gossiped about me.
I’ve forgiven each one of them, so I’m not holding any grudges, and I cannot allow offence to be taken.

Gossip destroys lives! In the spirit and emotionally.Words speak life! What life are you speaking when you speak about someone in the wrong way?We are all sick and tired of the same cycle of gossip. So lets start a new cycle of putting an end to it!! We need to avoid the areas that will pull you down! We need to constantly pursue love, peace, faith and righteousness.We need to get our Negative attitudes out of our life! Attitudes towards people.
‘If you have nothing nice to say don’t say anything at all’ this was a phrase that was said a lot by my family and me. I’ve learned that this phrase is GARBAGE!
We need to bring positive out of every situation, get negativity out of your hearts and minds!It’s your choice! Don’t allow yourself to be in a situation where you know you will fall, where you know Gossip will try and creep it, we need to cut it off.

Power to Change! - my 1st song!

2008-12-31T05:38:00.000-08:00

Hey y'all!

forgive me for not updating for a wee bit!

I had an amazing opportunity to write and record with theeeeee famous 'Scott Nicol' yesterday :)
He has been bugging me for a while that we will write a song before i got back to Canada, I didn't actually think it would happen!

Scott is an amazing inspiration to me, a great leader, a great friend and encourages me constantly and makes me laugh till I can't breathe anymore ha ha

I'm very thankful for Scott and his family :)

He is an amazing Music leader of Cornerstone Church and also has an amazing CD 'stunning silence' and will be touring in Texas in March! whoop whoop!

Oh ! And anyone reading my blog, he's looking for Gigs in Scotland and England.....hint hint, Sam Gallagher I hope your reading this! you wanna do a Gig sometime with this dude, he's pretty awesome like you! ;) ha ha

So Yesterday I wrote my first song! When I was young I did write many songs unfortunately I didn't keep any of the words and have no idea what the songs sound like, a little gutted! (silly Becka)

Before i arrived at Scott's house in Prestwick I was really nervous about writing the song , I had no idea how to and where to begin.

We sat down and he began to ask questions about what was on my heart, I flicked through some journals, devotions, prayers and prophetic words spoken over my life.

And this is how its all pieced together!

Here it is,

Power To Change

Oh Lord you word

has the power to Change and Renew
Equip and enable, examine my heart cause I love you

Transform my weakness into supernatural strength

Empower, protect me, renew my heart again

Lord I heard you say ' I have anointed your lips'

to speak to a lifeless world

I am knocking at the door, the door of your heart

so rise up and prepare the way for me

You are anointed and I will take you

to your appointed time and place

where I will mould you, you will be still, reflect and seek my face

If you come away from the crowd, away from the crowd, away from the crowd

Oh Lord you word

has the power to change and renew

Equip and enable, examine my heart cause I love you

Transform my weakness into supernatural strength

Empower, protect me, Renew my heart again

Renew my heart again

By Rebekah-Joy

Thank you Scott for making this song happen!

check Scott Nicol out on

www.myspace.com/scottnicolletyourlifebe

http://www.stunningsilence.co.uk/

The Smiling Experiment

2008-12-24T09:02:00.000-08:00

Well, honestly I'm a little Sad today, truth is I don't get sad often I'm a pretty joyful, happy girl and try to find the positive side of every situation.

But Today I'm a little sad,

I was walking through the town of Kilmarnock, the busy street with all the shops (can't really remember the name of the street) anyway the truth is I didn't see one person smile today, so I thought to myself if I'll smile at the people who walk by, a smile is always contagious so i want to spread the happy smile today!
well it didn't quite work, I got a lot of daggers especially from girls, and if i smile at a guy (by the way a little advice, smiling at a Ned isn't quite a good idea) all I got was;

"hawl you wit ye looking at?" or "wit ye all aboot?" "wit you smiling at?"

sooooo not a good idea to smile?? well stuff it I'm going to smile all I want I might get jumped but at least I will still be smiling! :)

My mum was shopping the other day and she was waiting 'exactly 22minutes' (she told me) in the Que for the ATM for some cash. The Que was pretty long obviously since she waited that long, as soon as it came to her turn the machine ran out of money, she didn't get angry all she did was laugh (i would do the same) what else can you do? there is nothing else you can do but laugh, thats what I think, even though its frustrating. You can choose your attitude!
Well she almost got booted by the woman behind her who was yelling and swearing at her because my mum was laughing "wit ye laughing aboot, your a pure nut heed" at this point my mum is laughing even more probably because of nerves, so the woman walks away swearing and yelling in the mall....... WELCOME TO SCOTLAND!

anyway I just had to share that story my point is I was sad, I was sad at the fact that these people don't have any joy and have nothing to smile about, it hurts me to watch this and know this I want them to experience the touch of God!

I think I might have to arrange a missionary team to come over here to Scotland from Canada... hint hint... any takers from Northgate??? we got a lot of smile rs from Northgate that's for sure :) Carla we need you! ;) he he

hope this wasn't depressing but just sharing what its like in my town, it is sad..... BUT

GREATER THINGS ARE YET TO COME, GREATER THINGS HAVE STILL BE DONE IN KILLIEEEEEEEEEEE! (Killie is short for Kilmarnock, just in case you got confused)

Desperate People

2008-12-21T11:06:00.000-08:00

You crossed the great divide, You took our place
You offered up Your life though we have failed
the veil was torn and love remained
You are holy Lord

Distraction costs us, how we seek Your face
we offer up our lives to bring You praise
a love the walls cannot contain
You are holy Lord

We're rising up in spirit and in truth
a living sacrifice we worship You
people undivided, Lord hear us sing we are Yours and You are our King

This is our love Hearts joined as one
Desperate for all You are
Lord break down these walls and see how we love
Desperate for all You are

We chase Your heart We didn´t come to leave here entertained
or worship under any other name
we're crying out for You alone
You are holy Lord

Show us the way to Your heart we found our voice we found our cause
were on our knees, the carpet's worn we join our hearts with distant shores
and sing to You Lord

I love how this song speaks everything that is on my heart, you can listen to this song on the Hillsong United Cd 'desperate people'

obeying without understanding..... ooohhh tricky tricky

2008-12-19T09:22:00.000-08:00

I’m having a wee giggle right now, a wee giggle with God :)
He amazes me! It amazes me to know that he KNOWS the plans that he has for me, so whenever I feel like I’m swaying from the plans that he has, he just tugs me and reminds me that, ‘he knows best’

Sometimes we find ourselves saying ‘No’ when we don’t understand; we pretty much have all cried out these little words “Lord I don’t understand! Why do I have to say no to this”, but when we trust in him then WOW it will hit you like BOOM!
I have often found myself struggling to obey when I don’t understand, but
We need to remember that God see’s the big picture and we only see the little picture, so for whatever reason that God is saying No to any situation we must trust in him. It isn’t easy it can be very tough but God will work out what’s best for you that’s exactly what he wants, he wants what is best for us! Don’t you feel a little spoiled by God?! :)

Today I rejoiced! A few weeks ago I found myself making a decision that I had been putting a lot of prayer into but I wasn’t finding peace, God gave many reasons why, so obeying without understanding wasn’t really my case, I had understanding because God was very clear why. But yet I wanted my way, (bad Becka!)
So I took a deep breath, I obeyed, and few weeks down the road I finally realized why God said no.
It all clicked in! And I give him all the Praise THANK YOU LORD!

So next time you struggle to obey when you don’t understand, learn to trust in him because it’s all for a reason!

Bling Bling and Hogmanay!

2008-12-15T06:34:00.000-08:00

I forget how Beautiful Glasgow looks at Christmas time, the bright lights the huge events they have in the month of December, i have to say thank you Glasgow for always making a HUGE effort to make December really special for family and friends.

but i love, love, love to Go ice-skating in George square, even though i can't ice-skate to save myself but thats me i mostly look like an idiot most of the time anyway.

the ice rink is soooo unique,

Beautiful eh?

i'm lovin it, lovin it, lovin it, i'm lovin it like this!

But theres more to be excited for! My wonderful close friend for a long time Bethany got me tickets for WINTERFEST 08!!!

Pure deed Brilliant man!! Am well chuffed!

Break my heart for what breaks yours

2008-12-13T11:00:00.000-08:00

I said a little prayer, 'Lord break my heart for what breaks yours'

God answered,

Although that's what I prayed I think I had forgotten that I did, my heart started to break over his people, his children, his sons and daughters, oppression, poverty.
my heart was breaking for whats Breaks God's.
sometimes I think we need to be careful for what we pray for, if we pray for strength God is going to place you in a position where your going to need strength, same goes for peace, patience, love, the list goes on.
so I prayed and I expected God to answer and he did.

being here In Kilmarnock is pretty tough, mainly because I actually hate this town, (Killie readers please don't jump me) the reason I say this is because I don't really have any good memories here, this is the place i done most of my stupid stuff, my years of being a very out of control teenager.
the people here only remember me as the girl I used to be before I went to Masters commission in Canada, now this is hard.
Not a lot of people are accepting the fact that I'm not the person i used to be anymore, my Mindset when i arrived back in Kilmarnock was 'God help me, i can't be here',
I know God is going to challenge me and stretch me and even Heal me in the areas that he can't necessarily heal when I'm in Canada, i have to be here.
so i have a choice to either stay in the mindset of 'always hating kilmarnock' or understand that there ARE greater things yet to come and Greater things yet to be done in this city, and allow God to use me here.

the Holy spirit stirrs in me when i sing and proclaim these words, a fire burns and i see hope and begin to proclaim that,

You're the God of this city
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You are
You're the light in this darkness
You're the hope to the hopeless
You're the peace to the restless
You are
and There is no one like our God There is no one like our God

For greater things Have yet to come And greater things Are still to be done in this city!
For greater things Have yet to come And greater things Are still to be done here

I think I almost fell off my chair

2008-12-08T07:25:00.000-08:00

I was Reading Ephesians 1 earlier in 'the message' , I almost fell of my chair, seriously i was awestruck.

I ask- ask the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory - to make you Intelligent and discerning in knowing him personally, your eyes focused and clear so that you can see exactly what he is calling you to do, grasp the immensity of this glorious way of life has for Christians, OH the utter extravagance of his work in us who trust him - endless energy, boundless strength!

what beautiful, sweet, powerful, anointed words, i couldn't resist i had to share this!

so my prayer for you is that these words will be spoken over you, that you will be intelligent and discerning to knowing him intimately and personally that your eyes will be focused and clear that you will know exactly what he has called you to be.
that you will grasp and grasp more the immensity and the excitement of the Christian life.
that you will be filled with endless energy and Boundless strength!

In Jesus name Amen!!!

Things i've missed the most about Scotland

2008-12-06T11:16:00.001-08:00

Yes this is my My favourite

Chips and curry sauce!! it was 10:30pm and i was craving chips and curry sauce so my lovely grandpa said he'll take me into town to the chippie, to add to my disaster All the chippies were closed, we drove around just to double check but nae luck mate! i was shocked! luckily the chip van stops on my street, YAS!!

this amazing Van looks a little like this and it made my day!

This morning my lovely mother made me a Scottish Breakfast yummy yummy,

and looks like this >

includes: black pudding, bacon, eggs, tatti scones (potato scones), sausage, fried mushroom, fried bread

better not eat many of these while i'm here

i've also missed my favourite drink Irn -Bru

Love the slogan: 'if it's not scottish it's craaaap!!

I've also missed these kind of people,

They sound better than they look ;)

Blessed beyond description

2008-12-05T09:26:00.000-08:00

Words can't even begin to say how incredibly blessed I am
I can honestly say I'm spoiled by the heavens, I'm spoiled by my Creator.

SO I live by faith and it has been and still is the most challenging, exciting, powerful, indescribable experience.

God provides, provides , provides he provides my EVERY need.

He places beautiful people into my life who bless, bless and bless with no hesitation, they are simply led by the spirit.

I am never without, I never lack because my creator provides

Don't get me wrong but Sometimes there's days where I worry and struggle by having no money in my pocket or bank but there's this peace and tug of the holy spirit reminding me not to worry and then 'POP' or should i say 'Shebang' a $100 comes from a friend or an anonymous person in a card or letter.
I'm awestruck, thankful, overwhelmed, joyful! and I give God all the glory.
Sometimes I fall to my knees and wonder, Lord? why? why bless me so? I haven't done anything to deserve this?
but a little reminder of the Holy spirit, you will reap what you sow.
I love to bless, and I'm constantly blessed, hummmmm God your funny.
yes i love to admit, I'm spoiled by the heavens and lack nothing, Clothes? seriously I receive random bags of clothes from people all the time.

Just a few months ago I felt the need of a laptop, and I felt a poke to pray, not a 'lord if you give me a laptop my life will be so much better prayer' but a reminder that God knows our needs and desires as long as its not selfish, so I felt almost hesitant to pray for this, but i did.
A few days after I was in the church office with my youth pastor's Jason and Kelsey, and Kelsey has this cute cheesy smile and pulled out a laptop and told me that they wanted to bless me!
WHOA!!!
God knows your needs and desires, He wanted me to have this laptop!

So Don't worry about your life because if you hold it to close you will lose it

* Here is my POINT:

Put God 1st life goes best
Put God 1st why worry? why stress?
Put God 1st you will lack nothing
Put God 1st you will stretch (ladies I'm not talking stretch marks I'm talking about faith)
Put God 1st you will have revelation.
Put God 1st you will be blessed, GARANTEED with a stamp! (maybe not a stamp, it just sounded good)

There is freedom when you put God 1st

How can I stand?

2008-12-04T09:21:00.000-08:00

How can i STAND here and not be moved?

How can I stand here and not be in Awe of you

How can I stand here and not Fall to my Face at your feet

How can I not bow?

how can I not raise my hands?

How can I Not worship?

How can I stand here and not be moved?

Tell me, how can you stand face to face with the saviour, with the one who gave it all and not be moved?
Tell me, how can you stand face to face with the one who adores you
Tell me, how can you stand here and not be in AWE.

I don't think it is possible for you to stand and not be moved
because the presence of the lord is so powerful and so overwhelming so indescribable that you can't possible stand and not be moved.

You shall be moved

- so i'll stand with arms high and heart abondoned in awe of the one who gave it all
so i'll stand my soul lord to you surrendered all i am is yours

SCOTLAND

2008-12-04T08:32:00.000-08:00

hey family :)

a wee update already

I've finally arrived in SCOTLAND!
...................that took a long time

LONDON - 5 hour layover- OH wow never again but i was so happy when i saw Starbucks in the airport..... i gave God all the glory! so while sipping on my VENTI peppermint white chocolate mocha i had a wee crying fest while reading 'the shack', i haven't quite finished it yet.

well its definitely different here i can't quite put my finger on it yet and my accent is thicker than anything!

I'm missing everyone already, thinking of all of you!

well i must dash i have a million people to visit!

A wee Trip

2008-12-02T11:47:00.000-08:00

So i'm leaving beautiful british columbia for 7 weeks today to my homeland SCOTLAND

i arrive in london in the afternoon and have a 5 hour lay-over.....hummmmm what am i going to do in Gatwick London for 5 hours??? hopefully i will be able to blog :)

then my flight to GLESGA i arrive around 8- 9 pm, i should double check that actually!

heres some things that i need prayer for while i'm in Scotland,

to be a woman of influence to family and friends

strength
integrity
to be a light in dark places
WISDOM

stepping out and being the woman of integrity that God has called me to be

2008-11-28T15:14:00.000-08:00

Okay, so a little freaked out.
Being a woman of Integrity humm…… I haven’t quite reached the full potential yet.
For some time now God has called me to speak to ‘broken woman’, and I definitely can’t do this by my own strength that’s for sure.
I sure can’t do this thing called Life without God’s strength!!

So For some time now I’ I’ve been trying to brush off the fact that God has a few specific callings on my life, a calling that I know that by my own strength I would not be able to accomplish anything. I know that by God’s strength anything is possible, that’s for sure!
I need constant guidance by the Holy Spirit. ‘ He keeps poking me’ it’s a good thing!

During Masters commission I had a super awesome room- mate who I simply love, God has given this girl incredible talents!
Well when your going to be living with someone for 9 months there’s bound to be an argument at some point! It happened to be about ‘laundry.
I knew the argument was silly and didn’t want to apologize but yet, the holy spirit poked me by saying ‘ Rebekah it about time you know how to deal with these situations because there will be a time where your going to be dealing with trouble girls and situations like this everyday, its about time you know how to handle this.”

God has definitely been stretching me and molding me more than I could ever imagine since Masters commission and doors just keep springing open constantly.

At this moment in this time I’ve been volunteering at a recovery house for woman who are recovering from drug and substance abuse.
I love these woman, I’ve learnt that these woman just need to be loved and I love loving on them!
The struggle for me was that i'm 20 years old and I’m looking after woman who were in there 30-40’s and that can be quite intimidating, plus to know that I have no idea what these woman are going through I know nothing really about drugs.

That’s when the ‘I’m too young’ phrase starts pulling in.

I’m inadequate!

I think most of us and some point in our life have cried these little words.
“I can’t do this” you have the wrong person, someone else can do the job better”

We need to be people of God who will Quit saying I Can’t!!
Don’t choose to be inadequate, because God loves to mold us but first we have to allow him to mold us, transform us, renew and cleanse us!

I need to keep reminding myself daily that this is a position that God has placed me in not anyone else, I need to learn patience and I’m also learning.
So I will use this time for God to teach me and also he placed amazing leaders in my life to help me on the way. Thank you Lord!

Ohh another thing I will try write less because I know some people hate reading long blogs SORRY!!!!!

just a little something that was on my heart to write PART 1

2008-11-26T11:27:00.000-08:00

Okay this is VERY LONG so i apologize

I wrote this a little while ago and posted it on facebook but im posting it on here because it is something that God has walked me through and its part of who i am. just a little testimony :)

Just a little something that was on my heart to write,

The day that the group of Masters commission and I came back to Canada from our trip to Mexico, I stayed in Nanaimo for a few nights just to have a few days to soak in everything from our trip, the amazing people we met, God’s love, his teaching and challenges.
My dad placed two books into my hands, but really it was God placing those books into my hands. Quite funny really, he really is a funny God.
Well they’re both John Bevere books, I thank God for this amazing man of God and his wife also. They’re books honestly apart from the Bible have changed and challenged my life!
Lisa’s books on ‘out of control and loving it’ and ‘be angry but don’t blow it’ are books I totally recommend but I’m going off subject so I’ll start back to my story.

All my life, from the moment I can remember as a young child I have allowed intimidation and offence to control my life.
A Big fat problem that I was not aware of.
At the age of 16 I left high school because of intimidation and offences, I also had to leave because everyday I was always ending up being beat to the ground by a bunch of girls. I was fed up and left.

Off to college I went with no qualifications and with a great fear of being hurt and treated badly.
I studied office technology in my first year then in my 2nd year I went to study beauty therapy, I loved the course but hated every minute of being in a class full of girls.

Gossiped ran so ridiculously rampant, and being in a class full of girls you can imagine. As much as I hate saying ‘a class full of girls’ somehow creates and defines what I’m trying to explain, the big bad picture of what girls are not supposed to be like, it breaks my heart.
God definitely does not want his beautiful daughters to be seen and act in this way.

Gossip, Gossip, Gossip, it ruins life, it hurts so many people, it offends people, it’s a horrible device from Satan that so many of us use. It destroys people spiritually and emotionally.

It was a hard year a lot of tears, blood (from waxing of course) and sweat (phew that facial massage was hard work!).
I was almost sure that by the end of my 2nd year I was done, there was no way I wanted to do a 3rd year in beauty, not because I didn’t like the course I loved the course but because I couldn’t handle staying another year with a whole bunch of mean girls.
How sad, the only thing holding me back was intimidation and offence from doing something that I loved to do.
Well it was pretty funny; God is, he told me to go back for the 3rd year.
I almost died! I begged God ‘don’t do this to me, please, please, please don’t do this to me’ and the reply in what I was dreading to hear was, ‘trust me!’
Well my 3rd year of College with a class full of girls was the best year!
These girls were simply so adorable, amazing encouragers, cared for each other, and me and honestly loved everyone. How thankful and blessed was I to have each one of these girls in my life that really touched my heart and stood by me.
None of these girls were Christians but God really showed me how he still works through all people.
Well I can honestly and proudly say no gossip reached my ears or was ever spoken the whole year I was there. That’s so awesome!
These girls understood how evil and how wrong gossip is and how it affects people, we lost a few girls who never came back for the 3rd year simply because they were offended and intimidated and one of them almost being me.
It breaks my heart to hear this, to leave a college course because of people’s careless words.
I knew God had more in-store for me so after college God was calling me to come to Masters commission in Canada.

God amazes me! He transformed me, washed me clean, healed me from my past and made me pure in his eyes. Continually teaches me daily, renews and refreshes my mind.
I truthfully thought there was nothing left he could wash me clean from and renew me in, how prideful and wrong as I.
Well God went out of his way to show me there was more in my heart that I was unaware of.
God will bring things up in your heart that need to be changed, that’s why he’s so awesome!
That exactly what he’s doing in me right now. Getting rid of all the garbage that I didn’t know was there, cause I got so used to the smell.

Often what we don’t realize that most of Satan’s devices are camouflaged and subtle, we don’t often know what we are fighting but we feel its effects of depression, confusion and lack of faith without knowing the root of where its all coming from.
When God placed, ‘breaking intimidation’ and ‘the bait of Satan’ into my hands, he was trying to show me and teach me what needs to be gone in my life.
I can honestly say ‘wow’ to the wisdom and anointing on these books that John Bevere wrote, when I finished the book of ‘breaking intimidation’ by heart was beating so fast I jumped up and down, danced around, felt amazingly free from something that had been a BIG part of my life!
But the best bit is, he’s still not finished. It excites me to know that this is only the beginning of him molding me.

My questions started to unfold, I know God has a plan in my life (he has for all of us), but why can’t I step forward in it.
There’s been so many things holding me back, I felt I wasn’t good enough and God could find someone else to do it.
My mind is thinking about all those people in the bible right now that thought and said the same thing.
The gift of God that he placed into my life remained dormant all these years, because I was intimidated, feared people and received offence constantly.

You’re probably thinking ‘Becka feared people? She’s around people all the time.’
Yep I know, I am a bit of a social butterfly and love being around people constantly! I love Family and love being part of the church Family!
I never used to in my teenage years, I used to shut myself in my room and hide, and I had so much fear. But God broke that off in my life, praise him!!

But how many of us know that God does not want us to fear, fear is not from God and the root of intimidation is fear! And fear cause people to focus on themselves.
Yep! It really does, think about it!
That’s the way I was, ‘me, me, me, focus on me’, ‘why does nobody care, my world is coming to an end, I do all this work and she treats me like that, bla bla bla bla!’ Go eat the can of worms becka, it will shut you up!

Well we all know that’s definitely not Godly attitude, but exactly what Satan wants us to think, he wants us to get our focus off of Jesus and onto ourselves.
Isn’t he tricky and mean? Grr! .

But God is a great God and is teaching us and has given us his amazing word, an amazing opportunity to have a relationship with Jesus Christ and has given us the Holy Spirit to guide us. Often I wonder, how can we fail? Look what God has given us! Look! But we are not perfect we can slip and fall but rise up again!
Satan wants to deceive since he is the master deceiver of course but he’s after us! We make him curl inside when were doing awesome things for the kingdom of God.

Before I came to masters, I would judge a lot of leaders that I knew weren’t living for God yet doing so much ministry in the church, I used to curl and despise the fact that I knew the nightclub I was at the night before, they would be there too doing the same thing that I was. At this time of my life I had literally turned my back on God and the church, I thought every Christian was fake and when I would hear rumors it would make me despise the church even more. So when I was out at the bars knowing that the people In ministry were there too! I hated it.
But now I realize that Satan’s primary targets is the leadership, the leadership of the church!
This blows my mind; to me this makes so much sense!
Being in masters is part of serving the church, reaching out to people, evangelizing, and building relationships. Etc, Satan hates all of what were are doing, so if he can get us to gossip about each other, cause division among us, intimidation and offences to occur, this gets our focus off of what God has called us to do and onto ourselves.
The enemy’s main goal is to distract us and break up leadership.
We made a covenant that our focus and commitment will be on God, What’s Satan’s goal? To break that!
The Holy Spirit constantly pokes me; ‘get your focus off yourself and onto others’

It is important to know our position in leadership, we need to grow as leaders even when we don’t feel like it and we need to continually recognize our inner issues. – Read that again! Recognizing our inner issues, not ignoring them!!!

We cannot ignore them, that’s not change! When we ignore our issues we need to bring them to Jesus, lay our burdens down, and laying our cards down! Being honest and getting right with God.

Lives will not be touched unless you deal with the realities and your issues! I have a little sticky note on my wall to remind me of this everyday!
What a huge responsibility to know that we cannot touch lives if we do not deal with our issues, we need to recognize them, don’t speak to God like a stranger tell him, for he knows already and he can change it!!

I’m gonna say it again and if I wasn’t writing this but speaking it I would sound like a broken record, in leadership it is important to know your position! Leaders! Know your position!

If you don’t know your position, you cannot function properly in the body of Christ and Satan seeks to displace us in order to regain the authority JESUS stripped away from him!
Did you guys get that??

When Satan knocks the keeper of the house (that’s the pastor) out of his position, all those under his care are vulnerable.
Wow what a big big big responsibility!
God appoints Pastor’s, teachers and leaders but when they go against God’s command all those under him are affected, including the congregation of the church.
We need to take the bible seriously when it says: not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly!!! (I like exclamation marks, it gets the point across!!. See!)

The reason teachers (pastors) are judged more strictly is because of their great impact of their disobedience. They not only hurt themselves but all those placed under their guardianship are.
God forgives them. However, they will still reap what they sow. The enemy is given place!
These are pretty hard words.

The other day my mum phoned me to let me know that a bishop in England whom we attended a conference at his church had a widespread ministry, bible college, huge Christian school, wrote many books. Anyway my mum phoned me to let me know that his ministry has been shut down because he had an affair with the choir director.
In my mind I didn’t think ‘ what a disgusting man, he calls himself a Christian!’ unfortunately I know if I was to respond in the past that would have been my response.
I grieved when I heard this, all I could think about were the people in the church under his authority, I grieved for him also and his family. I prayed and still praying for them.

I know he must still love God but it was probably the moment he stopped fearing God that led to this. But also if you love God you wouldn’t disobey his commands.
It hurts to hear stories like this, but when we do, we need to pray for them because their still our brothers and sisters, we need to still love them and respect that people do mess up and God will judge them not us!

We have seen too many tragedies, especially in ministries. We must not judge or condemn. We need to forgive and reach out to those who have failed.
Matthew 5:8- Jesus said, blessed are the pure heart, for they shall see God”
He did not say, “Blessed are those who have a successful ministry.” He said that without a pure heart you would not see God!

You are a target, the enemy will target you!

What i've noticed lately is that I’m starting to realize more of my weaknesses, and God is molding me but I must know that Satan knows my weaknesses too. The more God teaches me on my weakness the more Satan targets me.

Satan will blatantly try to steal our authority by bringing sin into your life.
Thinking back to the story of the bishop in England, Satan wanted to steal his authority, he has a widespread ministry, and Satan was targeting him.

If you are determined to serve God with all you heart, he will also try to knock you out of your position in Christ through intimidation.

One step that God showed me to break intimidation is that I must confront the matter in my own heart.
Often we think, I’ll just ignore this, and it will go away.
But we need to wake up and realize that what we do not confront will not change!Don’t put it under the carpet! (I hear this to often from Pastor Craig)! – Thank you it’s finally sinked in! haha!

I will go as long as your presence goes with me

2008-11-25T18:21:00.000-08:00

‘I will go as long as your presence goes with me and doesn’t leave me’
- I’ve been repeating these words in prayer for a while now

I have been here in Canada for over a year now and I’m proud to call this place home. My heart is here., I love this place, I love the people really my heart is here.
So my lovely mother in Scotland really misses me and wanted to surprise me with a ticket to come back home for a visit.
I got the surprise to find out I will be in Scotland for 2 months!…….. And my reaction……..I wasn’t too thrilled.
You know its amazing how God can Transform you, and renew your spirit I honestly feel washed clean, squeaky clean from the person I used to be.
Living in Scotland really brought out the worst in me and I definitely wasn’t living the life that God intended for me.

So For some time now since I found out I was going back to Scotland for 2 months I have pretty much been dreading it. I’m nervous, I’m worried and unsure what to expect.
I have been nothing but negative about going apart from the fact of seeing my wonderful family.
But I’ve come to find that God’s presence will go with me no matter where and as long and he is there to guide me I’m going to be okay J phew! Big relief to know.
I definitely cant walk this walk without God its too hard I can’t imagine my life without God out of the picture. For me that’s insane why would you CHOOSE to do that.
So it may not be easy going and I’m not going to be surrounded by as many amazing wonderful people that I have here in Canada in my church. But God has a plan.. im not really sure what that plan is yet but I will find out when I get there.

Take a deep breath Becka, and go!
Go because no matter what God is not going to leave me he is beside me he is my BANNER,
Jehovah Nissi- the lord is my banner he will direct me J